Why am I not Happy?
by Lawrence Vijay Girard
Copyright 2009
Have you ever asked yourself, “Why am I not happy?”
If we think about it, it is a little surprising and quite common for people to travel down the road of life knowing which way they are headed or where they are trying to get to.
In order to get at the heart of why this might be we need to look at the way we have been taught to relate to life as we were growing up. Our society is driven by the overarching belief that “things” will provide us with happiness. Get more things and you get more happiness. Have a desire + fulfill that desire = happiness.
Experience, through the fulfillment of some of our desires, teaches us that this simply isn’t true. Yes, we get a temporary uplift when we experience the fulfillment of desires, but that fulfillment doesn’t last. So we ride the roller coaster of short-lived satisfaction followed by yearning for the next fulfillment. Even those who fulfill their ultimate desire, like marrying their “soulmate” or winning a million dollars, never arrive permanently at a state of happiness. Those peak outward experiences inevitably fade in their intensity and leave a person wondering how they can recapture that “up” feeling.
Some people keep pushing forward in the hope that their efforts to accumulate happiness will eventually come to fruition. Most people never wake up to the reality that the fulfilling of outward desires doesn’t lead to happiness. In frustration many turn to drugs and/or alcohol.
The soul’s nature is joy, happiness and love. We instinctively believe that we can and should experience these qualities. The only problem is that many of us are looking for that happiness in the wrong place. We are looking outside of ourselves in the world of the senses, rather than within ourselves through our heart connection to the essence of life itself: Spirit.
To some it may seem that this is a speculative statement at best. Many people think that spiritual realities are anything but real. Keep in mind that I am not talking about E.S.P. or talking to the departed at a séance. What I am talking about is an infinite, all-pervading presence of joy, love and happiness that we can experience if we want to. It isn’t dependent on our age, race, culture, language or religion. The only prerequisite is that we be willing and interested in looking within ourselves to see what is going on in there.
In order to explore the inner world of Spirit we need to quiet the body and the mind. This is what the practice of meditation is for. Through the stilling of the restless mind the soul can begin to reclaim its natural state of joy. Once we have learned to tap that inner fountain of good feeling, we will be able to bring our outward lives into balance so that we can live in this world without losing our inner connection to happiness.
For those who have touched that inner wellspring you might be nodding your head up and down in agreement. If you have never had this inner experience you might be asking, “Well, if this is the way life is made why haven’t I experienced it?”
One of the quirks about the way that life has been made is that the secret to happiness is hidden within us, while simultaneously, the outward world tries to persuade us to look outside of ourselves for happiness. This tug of war is the battlefield on which we all stand as we seek to find balance, a sense of purpose and happiness.
One of the great things about the reality of life’s truths is that we don’t have to take anyone else’s word about what is true and what isn’t. We can each know the truth about life for ourselves by conducting our own personal experiments. I encourage you to look within yourself and explore your inner connection to life. Through that connection you will find the understanding and sense of well-being that you are seeking.